Saturday, August 27, 2005
It's Called Sleep and Your Body PROBABLY Needs It. MAYBE!!!!!
I know, I know, the title is kinda silly, but wait till you hear the stuff. Uhhh... Wait a sec... lemme think it up... heh heh...
Of course, you realize your body needs sleep. You wouldn't exactly think that you could survive it. Doctors actually recommend 9 hours. For those of 9 or above, you generally get 5. Of course, you could also just pretend your an insomniac. Hopefully the word "insomnia" will not escape your lips during your restful sleep from 5 am to 3 pm.
No, seriously, think about it. If you don't get sleep, your eyelids will turn the color of a rubber ball. Slowly, this section of rubberish growth will take over your body, and if you get too close to a fire, you'll inflate until you fly away or explode. The latter is occasionally fatal. Hey, it's called the miracle of American medical science. I hope never to experience it.
Now about the nine hours of sleep. How can anybody fit it in? For small children, there's crying to be done, and possibly some dirtying of diapers. For older children, there's fun to be had. For adults, there are actually valid reasons they can't sleep as long. For example, work. Also their baby, who is currently engaged in a noise contest with your dog, who is clearly not up to the task of combatting your baby's noise. Of course, you, as a mother, would clearly rather push your head between your pillows and ignore the rest of the world. But that would be classified as "child abuse." Clearly, this is ridiculous. I mean, why can't children get in trouble for "parent abuse?" Please institute this after I am twenty.
Of course, you realize your body needs sleep. You wouldn't exactly think that you could survive it. Doctors actually recommend 9 hours. For those of 9 or above, you generally get 5. Of course, you could also just pretend your an insomniac. Hopefully the word "insomnia" will not escape your lips during your restful sleep from 5 am to 3 pm.
No, seriously, think about it. If you don't get sleep, your eyelids will turn the color of a rubber ball. Slowly, this section of rubberish growth will take over your body, and if you get too close to a fire, you'll inflate until you fly away or explode. The latter is occasionally fatal. Hey, it's called the miracle of American medical science. I hope never to experience it.
Now about the nine hours of sleep. How can anybody fit it in? For small children, there's crying to be done, and possibly some dirtying of diapers. For older children, there's fun to be had. For adults, there are actually valid reasons they can't sleep as long. For example, work. Also their baby, who is currently engaged in a noise contest with your dog, who is clearly not up to the task of combatting your baby's noise. Of course, you, as a mother, would clearly rather push your head between your pillows and ignore the rest of the world. But that would be classified as "child abuse." Clearly, this is ridiculous. I mean, why can't children get in trouble for "parent abuse?" Please institute this after I am twenty.
